


there will be sex?...

by Puzzled_Shipper (yugimoto)



Series: downy unstoppables and other name brands [8]
Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! - All Media Types, Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Awkward Sexual Situations, Blue Balls, Break Up, Character Development, Confusing, Drinking, F/F, F/M, Flirting, Gen, Hook-Up, Hospitalization, Joey is a Furry, M/M, Multi, Protectiveness, Sex, Sex Toys, atem and yugi just want to have sex, concussion, downy unstoppables
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-16 19:35:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,929
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28587306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yugimoto/pseuds/Puzzled_Shipper
Summary: Atem and Yugi just want to have sex uninterrupted, but knowing their needy friends and neediest grandpa, it's going to take awhile before they have time to themselves. Complicated relationships.puzzleshipping/blindshipping, jiishipping (one-sided...or is it?), arfshipping, one-sided buddyshipping (or is it), noteshipping, tieshipping, coinshipping (possibly~)dedicated to some supportive peepshere's to over 30k words in this series <3works as a stand-alone
Relationships: Arthur Hopkins | Arthur Hawkins/Jounouchi Katsuya | Joey Wheeler, Arthur Hopkins | Arthur Hawkins/Mutou Sugoroku | Solomon Moto, Atem/Mutou Yuugi, Honda Hiroto | Tristan Taylor/Jounouchi Katsuya | Joey Wheeler, Honda Hiroto | Tristan Taylor/Jounouchi Katsuya | Joey Wheeler/Mazaki Anzu | Tea Gardner, Honda Hiroto | Tristan Taylor/Nosaka Miho, Mazaki Anzu | Tea Gardner/Nosaka Miho (onesided), Puzzleshipping - Relationship, arfshipping (joey/arthur), blindshipping - Relationship, noteshipping
Series: downy unstoppables and other name brands [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2049669
Comments: 22
Kudos: 19





	1. yugi & atem...interrupted

**Author's Note:**

  * For [daringidiot](https://archiveofourown.org/users/daringidiot/gifts), [WavesOver](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WavesOver/gifts), [ayelenrock](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ayelenrock/gifts), [anielsen33326](https://archiveofourown.org/users/anielsen33326/gifts).



Yugi and Atem had finally set a date for their wedding. It would be in a few weeks, and they were asking only two people to be their witnesses. It was going to be small, private, and in a courtroom. Solomon was banned from said courtroom. He had flashed the officials one time too many. Solomon and Arthur were now in a retirement home—for now. Who knew how much patience those people would have for them.

But that was a story for another time.

Because something more dire was occuring in the Muto household.

***

It was a week before Valentine’s Day. Solomon and Arthur had un-conjoined from their omegaverse roleplay and Solomon was basking in the afterglow.

“Solomon…” Arthur tentatively began. “I’ve been thinking about our relationship—no homo of course—but…” he fiddled with his wolf tail and sighed. Solomon stared at him obliviously with his raccoon-like eyes. He clearly had an undiagnosed thyroid condition because his eyes were literally bulging.

Arthur continued, “ _ Well... _ we’re both adults here…and these furry games have been fun, and dare I suggest…what if…” he sighed, “What if we…are a little  _ homo  _ in our activities? I feel that our sex might be sexual, if that makes sense.” 

Solomon folded his arms. “You  _ lied _ to me about the no homo? My mistake grandson told me that! I am so hurt, Arthur!” 

“Solomon,” Arthur sighed. “You are clearly  _ not  _ a straight man.” 

“I AM THE ANGEL OF DEATH!” Solomon roared. 

“ _ What? _ ”

“Nevermind.”

“Is that a roleplay for later—Well, I’d be happy to partake, but Solomon...I must admit I am developing strong feelings for you—”

“Yes, brotherly love!”

“No! That is disgusting, Solomon! I meant homo feelings!”

“No homo…?”

“ _ No!  _ Homo—I mean…I am gay for  _ you _ Solomon. This isn’t brotherly love. Can’t you see it? Surely you can see it when Yugi and Atem are together—” 

“NO!” Solomon roared. “Do not bring my grandsons into it!” He rolled over and slumped onto the floor. Arthur took a moment to recall if Solomon  _ had  _ a brother or not. If he did, he was genuinely concerned. 

“You lied to me!” Solomon wailed.

“Solomon,” Arthur sighed. “It’s time we put an end to this. I can’t do this and say ‘no homo’ any longer.” Arthur climbed out of the bed, removing his wolf ears and vibrating strap-on. “We’re done, Solomon.”

“I’ll call you tomorrow for more furry games, Arthur.” Solomon said as his dearest friend left.

“No, that’s not what I meant— _ ugh. _ ” Arthur slammed the door.

Solomon stared at the closed door. Did his alpha genuinely just... _ break up  _ with him? 

He needed to speak with Yugi about this. Solomon barrel rolled out of his bedroom and, like a rolly polly, barreled against Yugi’s door.

“ _ GRANDSONS! _ ” Solomon cried. “ _ ANSWER THE DOOR! IT’S AN EMERGENCY! HURRY! TIME IS RUNNING OUT!” _

He could hear Yugi curse through the door.

Solomon took this as his cue to kick the door down, revealing Yugi and Atem who were naked and huddled together in one of the beds.

“Grandpa!” Yugi screamed, yanking the blanket up to his and Atem’s chests. “Get the fuck out! Now! Aren’t you supposed to be with Arthur? I thought he was taking you to dinner or something.”

Solomon burst into tears and ran towards his grandsons with his arms wide open. Atem screamed.

“I need a hug!”

“Solomon, get your hands away from my erection!” Atem screamed.

“Oh my gods!” Yugi wailed.

“Erection? Atem, I don’t see you that way.” Solomon scratched his head in confusion.

“What the—? Dear Ra, I am  _ this  _ close to mind crushing you.” 

_ Atem—don’t I can’t afford the therapy bill! _

**_How many times now has he interrupted our sex? I have to ask if there will be sex in my head even as we are in the act, Yugi! This madman has gone too far._ **

Solomon ignored their screams and flopped onto the bed, crying miserably. “Arthur broke up with me!” he wailed. 

_ Oh Gods. _

“Grandpa…” Yugi sighed.

“Oh, Grandsons…” Solomon sobbed. 

“I bought you  _ two  _ Beds! If you would wear clothes for nap time you wouldn’t need

to huddle together for warmth.”

“Nap time?” Atem recoiled in disgust. “You deranged old man, I was a  _ Pharaoh  _ for Ra’s sake—“

Yugi placed a hand onto Atem’s shoulder. “It’s alright, ‘tem. Grandpa,” he looked at Solomon pointedly. “Atem and I are  _ engaged. _ ”

Solomon stared. His grandsons?  _ Engaged?  _

“But…” Solomon blubbered. “No... _ no!  _ I refuse to accept this!” he roared.

“I don’t need your approval, Grandpa!” Yugi shouted. “I tell you every day, damnit!”

“How selfish can you be?” Solomon cried. “Arthur and I just broke up. Show your Grandpop some respect!”

Atem gritted his teeth.  **_Yugi, are you sure you don’t want me to mind crush him?_ **

_ I am not sure, honestly! UGH...nevermind—we can’t! He probably only has one brain cell left! _

Solomon then cried himself to sleep on their bed. Atem seethed silently with rage, and Yugi spent the night questioning his existence. There would not be sex tonight. Between Yugi and Atem anyway.

But tomorrow was another day.

***

Tristan awoke to the sounds of his parents screaming at each other, a typical Tuesday. He was dressed in his fursuit from last night’s furry game with Joey. Joey had asked his sister, Serenity, to film their furry game roleplay. Serenity proceeded to cry and run away (again). There was a reason her mom had taken her away from Joey and their dad.

“Good morning world!” Tristan sang. “Good morning Joey!” 

Joey woofed.

Tristan stepped into his closet and retrieved his damp suit. Unfortunately, he thought it would have dried by the morning, but he appeared to be wrong. Maybe he should’ve gotten it dry cleaned like Yugi told him to. He rubbed some Downy Unstoppable scent booster beads into his neck and wrists as a cologne, before dialing Yugi’s number. He popped a few into his mouth like they were candy

It went immediately to voicemail.

“Tristan! Spit those out! Not after what happened with the tide pods!” Joey cried, woofing. He wrestled Tristan to the ground and sucked the booster beads out of his mouth. 

“Bad dog!” Tristan screamed. “Those are  _ my  _ Downy Unstoppables!”

Tristan pulled out his phone to try calling Yugi again. And again. By the fifth call Yugi answered and screamed at him through the phone.

“ _ I’m trying to have sex Tristan! _ ”

“Oh? How’s that going? Who with? Atem?” 

_ “What do you mean ‘who with’—who do you think?!” _

“...Well, Joey’s in my room, so I know it’s not him…”

“ _ How fucking stupid can you be?”  _ Yugi sighed. “ _ Atem, Tristan! ATEM! _ ”

In the background, Tristan could hear Atem’s voice. “Yugi, who’s on the phone? Is it Tristan?”

“HELLO ATEM!” Tristan shouted. 

“ _ He can hear you just fine!  _ What the fuck do you wnat? It had better be an emergency.”

“...I just wanted to say hi.”

Yugi ended the call.

Tristan sighed. He sometimes wondered if it was worth being Yugi’s friend after all. He truly was crabby. And not in a kinky furry way.

Tristan climbed on top of Joey’s back and screamed, “GIDDYUP!” Joey was now in Horseplay mode.

Joey galloped down the stairs in Tristan’s apartment. Tristan’s parents screamed about how much of a disappointment their freakish fetishist son was and his equally awful friends. Tristan ignored them. He didn’t choose the fetishist life—he had stumbled into it blindly and had never looked back. Because blindness. Not too unlike Joey’s sexy sister Serenity. She was eighteen now, it wasn’t weird for him to think that about her.

Tristan and his trusty steed galloped all the way to the Game Shop. Yugi could ignore his calls, but he couldn’t ignore him in person!

Tristan crashed through the door of the Game Shop, trampling over Solomon’s sobbing body.

“WOAH THERE!” Tristan cried, and Joey neighed.

Joey then climbed up the stairs on all fours and barreled into Yugi’s bedroom.

“ _ JOEY! OH MY GODS!”  _ Yugi desperately tried to cover himself with the bedsheets. “GET OUT! NOW!” 

Atem sighed. “I was going to cum, Yugi. Not any longer.”

“Tristan!” Yugi shrieked. “Joey! What the fuck is wrong with you guys?”

“Did you know your grandpa sobbing on the floor again?” Joey asked, woofing. 

“I...I am flaccid.” Atem mumbled. 

Yugi ground his teeth in sheer frustration. “Get the  _ fuck  _ out of my room. I  _ hate  _ you guys!”

“Woah, just take it easy man.”

“DO NOT QUOTE DRAKE BELL IN THIS HOUSEHOLD!”

Joey cried and galloped out of the room, sliding downstairs in some …  _ wetness  _ he did not need to know as to what it was. He hoped it was Solomon’s tears. What hurt him, though, was that Tristan didn’t follow him.

Tristan, meanwhile, completely ignored Yugi’s demand and jumped onto his bed. Atem shrieked.

“Yugi,” Tristan began to cry, “My parents are getting a divorce!”

Yugi shifted uncomfortably. “This...is  _ not  _ the time, Tristan.”

“My penis agrees,” Atem echoed.

“Don’t you two have any empathy!” Tristan sobbed heavily. Yugi and Atem exchanged an awkward look.

“Tristan, I am very sorry that your household is dysfunctional.” Yugi said, picking up his own hoodie off the top sheet and putting it over his naked body, “But,  _ one,  _ this is not the time,  _ two,  _ you broke into my house,  _ three,  _ I fucking TOLD you I was having sex, and...uhh... _ what number _ —four, they’ve gotten divorced and remarried more times than any of us can count!”

Tristan sobbed. 

“Tristan…” Atem started, awkwardly. “Why don’t you just...move out?”

Tristan sobbed and his furry face paint smeared all over his face. He waved his ill-manicured finger at Atem. “Why don’t  _ you  _ move out!” Tristan smashed Yugi’s duel disk in anger.

“Tristan! What the hell!”

“I’m going to move... _ here _ ! And you can’t challenge me to a duel about it!” Tristan sobbed hysterically. Tears glistened over the glitter he’d put on his face last night.

“Please, Tristan. If you don’t leave, I’m calling the cops. You and Joey can just go rot in jail, because it’s not like you’ll amount to anything else at this rate!” Yugi was clearly angry. Tristan couldn’t quite place why, but he knew he needed to get out of here before he ended up in the slammer. 

“But Yugi! I won’t last a day in prison! Joey sent me to doggy day care once, and I-I—” he broke off sobbing.

Atem and Yugi exchanged a look before they both kicked Tristan out of the bedroom. 

The door suddenly flew up. Solomon was wearing only his underwear and nipple clamps. At some point in his depressive episode he’d decided to remove his clothes and prepare himself in case Arthur changed his mind. “ _ YUUUUUUGI!!!” _

“OH MY GODS, WHAT DO YOU WANT?!”

“Your  _ furry friend  _ marked his territory all over my shoes! Now be a good grandson and clean that up for Grandpop.”

Tristan only continued to cry.

Atem twiddled his thumbs. “Perhaps I should have gone to the Egyptian afterlife after all, Yugi. Your grandfather is horrid and your friends are despicable.”

Yugi sighed, “I’m right there with ya, Atem.” Tristan heard Yugi mutter. When Tristan tried to open the door again, he realized that they must’ve locked or barricaded it.

Tristan clung onto Yugi’s legs for dear life. “Help me!” he cried.

Yugi tried to shake him off of his body, but it was to no avail. He awkwardly patted Tristan on the head. “There, there…”

Atem crossed his arms and scowled. “Am I getting head or not?”

“Are-Are you even in the mood still?”

“No. But we can fix that.”

Tristan obnoxiously wiped his tears all over Yugi’s shoulder and stood up. “It’s okay, I’ll leave.”

“Good riddance,” Atem grumbled. Tristan wondered if there would be sex after he left them alone.

(there will not be sex).

Tristan rode his pony and ran into a familiar face a few blocks away from the game shop. He nearly fell onto the sidewalk in shock.

_ Miho? _

“Miho!” He cried, kicking his steed aside to greet the purple-haired woman.

He hasn’t seen her in months. 

“Miho!” he cried. 

“Honda?” she stared at him in confusion.

“Excuse me? No, my name is  _ Tristan Taylor! _ ” Tristan snapped himself out of his shock.“B-But, you can call me Honda—because, baby you can drive my car anytime…”

“Nice, Tristan.” Joey murmured under his breath. He cringed, as he was actually in a lot of pain. Secretly, he wished Mai had accepted his furry kink. 

“Ohoho,  _ Honda... _ Can you run some errands for me later? Miho is  _ very  _ tired from moving back to Domino.”

“Of course! Did you know I have a motorcycle now? I am done playing dress up with Joey now...there was...a festival…”

Joey turned beet red. Apparently his furry roleplay partner was suddenly ashamed of their activities. Tears sprang from his eyes. What was Tristan doing? 

Miho turned to Joey—clad in his horse-dogsuit—and giggled. 

“ _ Tristan  _ is actually my furry handler, Miho!” Joey glared. “He even gave me a collar for my birthday, he takes me on walks and—”

Tristan punched him in the stomach. “What a funny, joke, Joseph! I…have to go do my laundry, but Miho, here is my number. I am  _ happy  _ to go do any...errands you may have. Leave it to Tristan Taylor!” 

“You don’t even have a washer anymore, you orphan!” Joey screamed, but Tristan was already running away as quickly as possible. “Hey, Miho...What even happened to you?”

She shrugged. “It’s not important. Maybe I’ll tell you later. Would you hold my purse?” 

“But I don’t—”

“Thanks!” Miho, giggling, skipped away.

Joey shook his head angrily. It was time to call some back-up.

He dialed Yugi’s number. It went straight to voicemail. So he called the game shop’s landline repeatedly.

“Hold, please!” Solomon answered, only to then moan.

“ _ Solomon! _ ” Joey cried. “It’s an emergency! Get Yugi on the phone!”

“Ok, one second!”

Joey paused. He could hear faint screaming on the line, until finally, Yugi picked up.

“WHAT NOW!”

“Miho came back, and...and Tristan ditched me to spend time with her. Not like I care...but I mean...now I’m gonna have to go live with my deadbeat alcoholic dad instead of living in his childhood bedroom’s closet in the same house as his dysfunctional parents.”

“That’s not my problem.”

“That’s so mean, Yuge! We’re supposed to be best buds—”

“You interrupted me and Atem not once, but  _ twice  _ now, and caused my grandpa to see me naked twice today. Do you see why I’m pissed as all hell?”

In the background, Joey could hear Atem muttering something.

“It’s not  _ my  _ fault your weirdo grandpa keeps walking in on you naked!  _ Please,  _ Yuge, I need your help!”

“You asked him to—ugh...Listen, I’ll tell you what. We can meet up later tonight, say at six? We can meet up at Burger World and chat about stuff. Okay?”

“Deal!”

Joey could’ve sworn that he’d heard Atem ask, “Will there be sex?” before Yugi hung up.

~burger world~

Yugi stared at Joey angrily.

“So….” Joey frowned. “Did you have sex?”

“ _ No.  _ No, I didn’t Joey.”

“Oh…”

“Who’s this Miho girl?”

“I don’t know! But she’s going to take Tristan away from me!” Joey cried.

“Miho…” Yugi mused. “ _ Oh _ , from high school! Joey, you know her!” He realized that last part. He sighed, feeling a bit of compassion for his friend. “I’m sorry to hear that…I honestly never really knew if you two were serious or if you just liked having threeways? But still, that sucks.”

Joey pretended like he wasn’t crying. “Yuge…What am I gonna do? Tristan and I—well…we were always close…and I mean we were  _ living together _ , we never really decided what we were, I guess. He—He even pretended like we weren’t playing furry games in front of her.” 

“Then...you should  _ talk  _ to him, Joey. Tell him you see him as more than someone to play your...furry games with.”

Joey sighed. “Alright. Alright. I think I will. Thanks, Yuge!”

Yugi sighed. Despite how annoying his friends were, he did care at least a bit. “You’re welcome.”

~joey and tristan break up~

“ _ YUGE! _ ” Joey screamed. “How could you do this to me!”

“What in the fuck did I do?! Tristan broke up with you, not me!”

“He said he likes Miho better! And that he was just using me to pass the time!” Joey threw the nearest object—a Gameboy Advance—at the nearest wall—a window. Glass shattered everywhere. 

“Yeah…You’re paying for that, Joey.” Yugi muttered. 

“Shut up! What’s it matter to you? You get to play furry games with the  _ Phawoa  _ all day—“

“We absolutely do  _ not  _ play furry games together, Joey!”

“You are a horrible friend!” Joey screamed. “I’m going to fix this myself!”

“How ironic,” Yugi grumbled. “Can you at least clean up the glass for me?”

“I hope your penis falls off!”

“Thanks, Joey.”

Atem ran down the stairs. “ _ Whose  _ penis fell off?” He looked around frantically.

“Nobody’s.” Yugi mumbled.

“I don’t think you ever had any balls, Yugi!” Joey shrieked, storming away with manly rage.

“Yes he does…” Atem said. He was confused. “Yugi, why is he inquiring about your genitals?”

“...Forget it. He’s just upset because Tristan broke up with him.”

“Really? His Alpha?” Atem began to laugh.

“Don’t fucking start with me, Atem.” Yugi sighed. “I’d feel bad if he weren’t so…so obnoxious and destructive! Look at the glass everywhere!”

~bar~

Joey drowned himself in four whiskeys. He was so depressed. He looked over his shoulder and could see Tristan—with no fake eyelashes or manicured nails—laughing with Miho. It was disgusting. He ordered another doubleshot. He was getting wasted tonight. A sad old man with cat ears sat next to him. “Say…” the man greeted, “I know you! You’re a friend of Solomon Muto’s grandsons are you not?”

“Professor Arthur?”

“Yes!”

“Yeah, I’m Joey. I’m...well, I  _ was  _ their friend. Yugi convinced my boyfriend to break up with me.” Joey sighed. “Well...I guess he didn’t consider himself my boyfriend. We were just...furry roleplay-mates.”

“Ah,” Arthur sighed. “I understand the feeling. Solomon grew flustered when I asked him if we could be more than furry roleplay-mates.”

“Wait...You and Solomon aren’t together anymore either?”

“I’m afraid not,” Arthur took a seat next to Joey and clinked his whisky glass with his own. 

_ Hm... _ Joey thought to himself. He had to get back at Tristan somehow. Tristan could lie all he wants to Miho about not being interested in furry games, but seeing a new Alpha replacing him would set him off for sure. He was going to hook up with Arthur.

“So…” Joey tapped his glass. He wasn’t exactly the best at flirting. But Arthur was definitely picking up what he was putting down.

“Tell me,” Arthur turned towards Joey. “How is an attractive omega going to go through his heat tonight without any company?”

Joey genuinely blushed. “I don’t know...Maybe he’ll have to go home with a new alpha who’ll take care of me.”

Joey could feel Tristan’s eyes on him. He didn’t care. He kissed Arthur directly on the lips. 

~there will be sex…?~

Tristan watched angrily as Joey and Arthur left the bar. Joey was supposed to be  _ his  _ omega! 

“Is something wrong?” Miho frowned. “Is my purse too heavy?”

“What…? No, of course not!” Tristan laughed anxiously. He uncomfortably fiddled with the collar of his dry shirt. It felt incredibly unusual to use the dry cleaning. Usually he’d wear a hoodie or casual shirt to the bar—unless he was feeling fancy and his mom agreed to wash his suit for him. Of course...before the fifth divorce.

He chewed nervously on a Downy Unstoppables tablet. “It’s nothing…” 

“Okay. Can you get me another strawberry mojito with six cherries, half-shot of tequila, with some diet sprite?”

“...Do you just want  _ juice? _ ”

“Get me it now, Honda!  _ Six  _ cherries exactly!” She slapped the Downy Unstoppables bottle out of his hand. “And stop eating this like it’s candy! That’s toxic!”

Tristan’s eyes welled with tears as his Unstoppable beads were scattered all over the bar floor. He miserably stood up and went to go get another drink. 

He wanted his omega back.

As he picked up the Mojito, Téa bumped into him.

“Tristan!” Téa cooed, fixing his collar. “Do you want to have a threeway tonight with Joey?”

“I’m...sorry, Téa. Joey and I broke up. Miho isn’t a fan of threeways either.”

“You broke up? Oh no! I’m—Wait, Miho doesn’t want to have a threeway with me? Doesn’t she know I’m good at sex and I’m kink friendly?” She huffed, storming over to the table. She was going to pick up her old friend who she hasn’t seen in years.

“Miho!” Téa called. “This is a once in a lifetime opportunity!”

“What are you even talking about…?”

“Sex! With  _ me!  _ And Tristan. Usually, Joey would be involved too. He’s the omega of the relationship. I’m a switch.”

“But  _ Honda  _ gave me a promise ring! We are not having sex!” Miho hissed.

“I’m surprised,” Téa frowned, “to hear what a boring virgin you are. Don’t you know Tristan is into the omegaverse? He won’t be able to keep it in his pants for much longer.”

“Téa, you slut!  _ Honda  _ doesn’t play furry games, he told me so,” Miho huffed. “I suggest you leave me alone!”

Téa scowled. What a bitch Miho turned out to be. She’d have to talk to Yugi about this. She stormed away.

~the game shop~

Téa was about to knock on the door, when she noticed that the window was shattered. She carefully climbed through, preparing to talk to Yugi. It was rare that she’d visit the game shop for him. Normally she’d come by to try to turn Atem, but she was giving up on that. Yugi and Atem were weeks away from getting married and she was running out of time. And at the same time, she realized that she’d much rather have sex with Joey and Tristan. Sure, they tended to focus on each other, but she was happy to be their Beta. When they weren’t sobbing, they could  _ really _ please her.

“Yugi!” She yelled. There was no answer. She decided to go check to see if he was in his room. She knocked on the door. No answer.

Téa took that as a cue to open the door.

“TÉA!” Atem shrieked. “I AM GAY, TÉA!”

“Oh,  _ relax,  _ Atem. I didn’t come to see you.” She tutted, realizing that her friends were in the middle of being more-than-friendly. “That being said…I’m down for a threesome if you are?”

“NO!” 

Téa sighed. “Yugi, what the fuck is happening with Tristan and Joey? I think Joey went to go fuck Professor Hawkins tonight.” She said, taking a seat on the foot of their bed.

“Téa! We want privacy! You can’t just barge in here!” Yugi said, covering up Atem’s lower half with the blanket. He tried to ignore the disgusting image. “I have  _ blue balls _ , dammit Téa!”

Atem uncovered the blanket so that he could see. “Yugi, those are not blue.”

“ _ Stop it! _ ”

“Do you want to look at mine?”

Yugi sighed in frustration. “I...am no longer hard. I am in  _ pain. _ So much emotional and sexual pain…Have you ever heard of calling first, Téa? Of not barging into someone’s room? I don’t care what the others are doing!” 

“I know you know what happened!” Téa crossed her arms.

“Fine! You want the truth? Joey thinks it’s  _ my  _ fault Tristan broke up with him. So, yeah, he probably went to fuck Professor Arthur, who broke up with my Grandpa. He’s a sobbing mess and I can’t stand it any longer!” Yugi groaned. 

“ _ Well,  _ since you broke them up,  _ I  _ can’t get laid by them anymore! And I am not hooking up with Arthur. I have standards, Yugi… _ standards!” _

“No you don’t!” Yugi screamed. “Get the fuck out!” He threw a pillow at her.

“Fine! But just so you know—you’re missing out! As if you didn’t chase me for years, Yugi!” She stormed away.

Atem sighed. “Yugi, perhaps we should rethink when and where we have sex.”

“It’s literally our room! It’s three in the morning! I—”

“My sundial says it’s 3:15, Yugi.”

“You know what? I  _ don’t  _ want sex tonight anyway. There will be no sex.” Yugi threw the pillow at Atem’s face and stood up. He was going to go downstairs to get some water until Joey suddenly knocked on the door. Yugi grumbled as he answered it.

“Joey! What the hell are you doing!”

“I came to clean up the glass!” Joey smiled. “Hi, Atem.” He walked into the bedroom—and he wasn’t even wearing his fursuit.

“It’s 3...oh, I’m sorry,  _ 3:15  _ in the morning.” Yugi scowled. “Weren’t you with Arthur?”

“I was. But he encouraged me to come here to fix my friendship with you, and Atem. I’m done being Tristan’s omega!”

“Good...for you.”

“Thanks, Yuge. And, I owe you an apology—a lot of apologies. I’m sorry for blaming you for my own terrible relationship and for barging in on you guys. I probably did it again.” He looked away sheepishly.

“Actually…” Yugi sighed. He mumbled, “Téa beat you to it. But I forgive you, Joey. It was big of you to come over and apologize.”

They hugged. Yugi hissed slightly in pain. 

“Are...you okay?” Joey asked.

“I’m fine.” Yugi sighed. “Thank you for cleaning this up. But again, if you want to hang out later, just let me know so that I have time to be ready, okay?”

Joey nodded. “I’ll walk Téa home, Yuge!”

Yugi was absolutely floored. He’d been so used to Joey the intrusive and inappropriate furry. He hadn’t seen his  _ best friend  _ Joey who happened to be a furry in so long. He could almost cry from the relief of having a normal friend again. He didn’t care who he was fucking at this point. Maybe if he gets rid of Téa…there could be sex between him and Atem finally. 

~end…?~

to be continued...


	2. blue balls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> pray for yugi

Tristan was at the drycleaners feeling extremely uncomfortable. Since reuniting with Miho, she had forced him to properly dry his suits, donate his extra small Abercrombie hoodie to Goodwill, and stop eating Downy Unstoppable in-scent booster beads.

He hated every second of it. He couldn’t even bring his leash in public anymore! No omegaverse paraphernalia allowed! Not like it mattered anyway…because his former omega, Joey, found a new alpha. Stupid Professor Hawkins.

Tristan started to cry. His life was going to shit.

“Hey, furry boy! Can you clean my sex toys for me?” Solomon asked, waddling into the drycleaners. 

“ _ Grandpa! _ ” Tristan cried.

“Grandson?” Solomon frowned. “How many grandsons do I have…?”

“He’s  _ not _ your grandson,” Yugi muttered, who was being dragged into the drycleaners. “Grandpa, let my fucking hand go! I’m not a child!”

Tristan cried harder, “Yugi, please. You need to make Joey get back together with me!”

“Who?” Grandpa frowned.

“My omega!”

“Tristan, please…” Yugi sighed, pushing his Grandpa out of the way. “Not in public. Y’know, Joey is actually  _ happy  _ and  _ normal  _ with Arthur.”

“I don’t care!” Tristan screamed. “You’re an awful friend Yuge-poo!”

“ _ I’m  _ a terrible friend?” Yugi retorted, face hot with rage. “I’m not the one interrupting your most intimate moments and contaminating them with absolute fucking stupidity!”

“This isn’t about your vanilla sex life with Atem, Yugi!” Tristan shrieked. “How self-absorbed you are!  _ You’re  _ the one who made Joey break up with me, and now  _ you  _ have to fix it.”

“Are you kidding me?” Yugi groaned. “Tristan,  _ you  _ broke up with Joey after Miho came back. If you want Joey to be your…  _ furry friend  _ so badly once again, figure it out yourself!”

Yugi then stormed out of the drycleaners, leaving Solomon and Tristan alone.

Solomon and Tristan exchanged an awkward look.

“So…” Solomon re-adjusted his bra straps. “Are you looking for a new omega?”

“ _ Gross!  _ Get out of here, old man!”

“But I’m in heat!”

“ _ GET OUT! _ ”

“NO, Tristan! I will not! I want to wash my clothes at the drycleaners today! I do not care if I have a washing machine at home, unlike  _ you!” _

“My mother took the washing machine after the divorce!” Tristan cried. 

“And that’s supposed to be my problem? Now be a good grandson and wash my sex toys. I don’t want to be charged extra, but Yugi refuses to touch them.”

Tristan slapped Solomon’s hands away. The sex toys scattered all over the floor. Solomon screamed as he chased after his vibrators and cat tails. 

Tristan ran outside, sobbing miserably. His clear mascara that he secretly applied when Miho wasn’t looking was now watering away. What was the point of his life now? Who was Tristan Taylor, without Joey Wheeler? Why did he have such awful friends like Yugi and Atem?

Tristan sat there in the middle of the sidewalk. How had his life gotten to this point? _ Who even was he?  _

He continued to cry until he felt someone angrily kick his back. 

“Get the hell out of my way, homeless commoner—oh, it’s  _ Tristan. _ ” Atem sighed.

“Atem?” Tristan wiped his tears, embarrassed. “What’re you doing here? You’re usually joined to Yugi at the hip.”

“I was looking for him until you distracted me with your presence. We...are trying to  _ spice  _ up our sex life,” he bit out the word. “Since apparently we can no longer have sex at the Game Shop—in our  _ own home— _ without someone screaming or crying. If only either of those things were a turn on for us!” 

“He just left. He was very mean to me.” Tristan started sobbing again.

“...Understandable.” Atem turned to leave, but Tristan grabbed him by the cape. 

“No, Atem! Don’t leave me here!” Tristan sobbed hysterically.

“I was a  _ Pharaoh.”  _ Atem sighed. He patted Tristan’s pointy greasy hair awkwardly.“There, there…” He brushed his hand, which was now slick with grease and unwashed conditioner, awkwardly on his cape. 

“I want Joey back!” Tristan screeched, throwing himself into a belly flop onto the filthy sidewalk.

Atem groaned. This was not something he was good at or comfortable doing. Yugi was the one who was halfway decent at comforting something. He awkwardly kicked Tristan in the side. “You will get stepped on this way!” He yelled. “Stop your blubbering and go call your furry friend.”

“I  _ can’t!  _ He’s with Arthur now, and I don’t want another Alpha to notice me as competition.”

“For the love of Ra…”

“ _ Please!  _ Help me, Atem! Mind crush Arthur for me!”

“There is no  _ valid  _ reason to mind crush Arthur. Solomon would cry all month if I did so. Yugi told me not to mind crush those elderly men. Absolutely not.”

“But…”

Atem sighed. He was feeling a  _ twinge  _ of pity for Tristan. “Unless...per say...if Arthur was to hurt Yugi, then I would mind crush him. But I could give a rat’s ass if he hurts your stupid feelings.” He flipped his cape dramatically. “Good day.”

Tristan watched Atem storm away, shouting at random strangers in the distance. 

He needed to make a plan. He had to get Atem to mind crush Arthur  _ somehow _ . Perhaps if Atem weren’t so sexually deprived he’d be in a better mood… 

~game shop~

Yugi was arguing with a regular customer inside who was trying to rob the place as he does weekly. 

“No! You can’t have these boosters for free! The price is right there, sir.”

“I am taking them anyway.”

“Sir, I’m calling the police.”

Yugi was then decked in the face, left unconscious behind the counter.

Solomon was snoring in the living room, until he heard the punch. “Huh? What is it? Yugi?”

No response.

Solomon fell back asleep.

Téa stormed inside of the Game Shop, tripping over Yugi’s unconscious body. “ _ Ugh!  _ Yugi, watch where you’re going!” She dropped her purse unceremoniously onto his chest. “Solomon! Where’s Atem?”

Solomon gurgled something in his sleep. Téa, sighing, kicked Yugi. “Wake up! We’re in a crisis!”

“What the…” Yugi rubbed his face. 

“We need to get rid of that Miho bitch!”

“ _ Agh!”  _ The pain in Yugi’s head finally registered. He groaned, using the shelf to prop himself up. “Téa, what the fuck are you talking about?” He winced in pain. “Oh my gods, I think I have a concussion—”

“ _ Yugi!  _ Stop being so selfish! Your friends need you!” Téa moaned. “Miho broke up Tristan and Joey!  _ I’m  _ not getting any, and Tristan is devastated. Miho isn’t interested in me…” She sobbed.

“I think I have to go to the hospital…” Yugi mumbled under his breath, clutching his forehead.

“Shut up! We need to do something, Yugi! Get your act together!” Téa stomped her foot.

A loud crash was heard in the living room. Solomon had collapsed onto the ground. 

_ “Life alert! What is your emergency? Hello? Hello?” _

“Dad?” Solomon asked, waking up from his slumber. “Hello? Why are you calling me? Did you get your milk?”

_ “Oh, no...not Mr. Muto again…” _ The line hung up.

Solomon shrugged and poured himself a glass of milk. 

Yugi tried to stand up to the best of ability, shifting his weight onto the shelf. “Téa, for fuck’s sake...I  _ don’t  _ care…” he winced.

“She won’t have sex with me!  _ Why? _ ” Téa cried. “Is it because I’m the Beta in the relationship? Does she even like furry games?”

Yugi groaned in response, clutching his forehead. He really needed new friends. Téa continued to talk, getting shriller by the second. The door to the Game Shop suddenly swung open. It was Atem. 

Téa turned her head and frowned. “Pharaoh, you look sexually frustrated this morning. Do you want me to give you an oil massage?”

“ _ No,  _ Téa…” Atem grimaced. He took a look at his fiance who looked like he was writhing in pain. “What happened, Yugi?” He quickly put himself between Yugi and Téa.

“Someone stole a booster pack and punched me in the face…”

“ _ Again?” _

“Yeah...This time it actually knocked me out.”

“I will murder him! I will—”

Yugi groaned. 

“Can we stop talking about Yugi for  _ once? _ ” Téa scowled. “Atem, we’re in a crisis. Ever since this Miho bitch showed up,  _ nothing  _ has been the same. Yugi made Joey and Tristan break up, and now neither of them won’t have sex with me—”

Yugi suddenly collapsed onto the floor.

“Aibou!” Atem’s eyes widened. “Téa, you wench! Your talking sent him into a concussion!” He knelt to the ground before picking up Yugi bridal style. “I’m taking him to the hospital! I swear to Ra, I am  _ this  _ close to mind crushing  _ you! _ ”

Téa gasped. Not out of fear, but out of epiphany. Now Atem had provided her with a plan. She’d get him to mind crush Miho.

Then Tristan entered the game shop.

“ Téa!” He yelled, crying. “What happened to Yuge-poo? Was it because I told him that he’s a terrible friend? I—Oh Gods it’s all my fault.” He sobbed.

“No,  _ no,  _ Tristan. He’s fine. Someone punched Yugi, and now Atem is ready to mind crush anyone who hurts him.”

“... _ Anyone _ , you say?” Tristan said. It then clicked. 

Atem carried Yugi out of the Game Shop, thankfully before Solomon noticed.

“Téa, we’ve been going about this all wrong,” Tristan whispered. “I’ve been trying to get rid of Arthur, and you’ve been trying to get rid of Miho. We have to work together as a  _ team _ !”

Téa started to tear up—from happiness. She held out her hand. “Alpha and Beta?”

“Alpha and Beta.” Tristan clasped her hand. “Let’s go to the hospital and completely mess up Yuge-poo!”

“Alright!”

~the hospital~

“Yugi, my love. I’m so sorry,” Atem brushed his fingers through his hair. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

Yugi, grimacing, grabbed onto his hand. “Stay with me?” he asked quietly.

“Of course,” Atem smiled, “I have no interest in surrounding myself with your  _ wretched  _ friends anyhow.” 

Yugi sighed.

“I must know, Yugi. Who punched you?”

Yugi shyly looked away. As much as he despised the customer, he didn’t want to give away his identity. “Some butthurt customer…” He mumbled. “I-I don’t remember his name.”

Atem stared. He had a feeling Yugi was lying, but wasn’t going to press him about it. He decided to let it go. But of course—if he could figure out who it was  _ himself,  _ that’d be a different story altogether.

He kissed Yugi gently. “You’re going to be alright.”

They smiled at each other, until the doctor—who has been in the room the entire time—coughed uncomfortably.

“Do we have a problem?” Atem glared.

The doctor sighed. “Mr... _ Muto _ —ah, what a familiar name in this hospital—that punch and fall took quite a hit.” He took a step closer. “Do you mind if I take a closer look for swelling or bruising?”

Atem growled, “You are  _ fine  _ standing  _ there. _ ”

“Sir…” the doctor rubbed his eyes tiredly. “ _ Please  _ step to the side so I can examine my patient.”

“Examine your patient? What is this, an euphemism for sex?”

Yugi sighed. “Atem...It’s okay, just let him do his job.” He gave 

his hand a light squeeze. Atem sighed.

He looked at his aibou and then at the doctor. Pointing his finger into the doctor’s chest, he warned, “If you harm this man in  _ any  _ way, I will mind crush you.”

“...Excuse me? Are you threatening me, sir? What is a  _ mind crush _ ?”

“Silly commoner,” Atem spat. “You should  _ pray  _ you do not need to find out. Do not  _ dare  _ to trespass within my soul either.”

“...Okay, sir.”

“Address me as Pharaoh at  _ once! _ ”

“Atem!” Yugi pleaded in a shrill voice. “Please, just let him do his job!”

Atem, with his hands raised, stepped to the side. The doctor sighed.

“Well, Mr. Muto,” he stated, ignoring Atem’s growls. “You should take this time to rest. No strenuous activity. This includes sex.”

“ _ What?! _ ” Atem and Yugi shouted in unison.

“I said—”

“I  _ heard  _ what you said!” Yugi cried. “I  _ have  _ to have sex! I have blue balls!” he started to cry. “Atem is so sexually frustrated, he-he’s not usually this aggressive—my stupid grandpa,” Yugi was sobbing now, wincing in pain, “Kept….interrupting...us...and-and—” 

“I am sorry, Mr. Muto, but your stupid Grandpa is no excuse to—”

“Foolish doctor!” Atem roared. “We have  _ needs!  _ I can’t stop watching Egyptian coverage on the History channel as soft core porn!”

“That...is an odd choice, but it will be over before you know it. Have a nice day. And Mr. Muto, please tell your Grandfather to find another hospital.” He left.

“This is absurd,” Atem scowled. “How are we supposed to  _ spice  _ up our sex life now?” He looked down at Yugi and frowned. Tears continued to stream down Yugi’s face.

“Aibou…” Atem frowned. He leaned forward and kissed his cheek. 

“This is  _ horrible _ ,” Yugi whispered.

“Maybe...maybe, this could be a good thing! We will both be  _ so  _ sexually frustrated, once you recover,  _ there will be sex!  _ And everywhere!”

“But, Atem…”

“I will make sure you recover!”

“Please don’t make me wear a leaf necklace again.”

Atem laughed. “That’s only for when you’re hungover, Yugi!”

“Okay, then... _ no  _ strange Ancient Egyptian healing methods, period.”

Atem strokeed Yugi’s bangs away from his face. “As you wish. I will let you rest as the... _ doctor _ has instructed.”

“At least it’s mild…” Yugi mumbled bitterly.

“I should’ve come home sooner.” Atem mumbled. He was going to stand there all night if he could. They’d said that he’d be released the next morning. 

And Atem did stand there while Yugi slept and nurses came and went. And then two people who were  _ not  _ hospital staff entered the room.

“Tristan Taylor reporting for duty!” Tristan marched directly into the room, only for his face to turn stark white at the sight of Atem.

“Oh Gods…” Téa mumbled under her breath.

“ _ What  _ are you doing here?” Atem hissed like a cat. “We are not interested in hearing about your furry sex lives!”

“Omegaverse, Atem.” Téa rolled her eyes. “You are so vanilla.”

Atem gasped as if he was insulted. “I will have you know that is  _ not  _ the case—”

“ _ Ooooh _ ,” Tristan sang. “What are you into, Pharaoh?” 

“That is none of your concern—what on earth are you two doing here? Have you come to visit Yugi, or are you here to make pests of yourselves as usual?”

“We...are here...because…” Tristan twiddled his razor with his fingers. “Did you just call us pests?”

“To visit Yugi!” Téa interrupted. “We were  _ soooo _ worried.” She fake cried. It was not even remotely convincing.

Atem rolled his eyes. “Téa, if you are truly here because you are trying to convince me to have sex with you, I am a  _ homosexual man _ .”

“You know what, Atem?” Téa scowled. “Not everything is about you! Now can you just give us some privacy with our dear friend Yugi?”

“Absolutely not, Téa! I don’t trust either of you to behave like respectable individuals—especially considering you’re holding a razor? For some reason?” 

“Okay, fine!” Tristan wailed, sobbing freely. “We were going to shave him BALD! And blame it on Arthur and Miho so you’d mind crush them.”

“Tristan,  _ what the fuck _ ?” Téa and Atem said simultaneously.

“I’m sorry! My parents divorced! I’ve been in so much pain!” Tristan sobbed, clinging onto Atem’s cape for dear mercy. “Please, spare us!”

Atem was visibly seething with rage. It was dark in the room, but his whole demeanor changed, and anyone within a mile radius could feel the negative, vengeful energy radiating off the former-pharaoh. 

“ _ How pathetic, _ ” Atem spat. He shoved Tristan off from his cape. Tristan fell onto the floor; fear clearly in his eyes.

_ “ _ **_MIND CRUSH!”_ **

Nothing.

He tried again.

_ “ _ **_MIND CRUSH!”_ **

Still nothing happened. The clock ticked. Yugi groaned in audible frustration as Atem’s screams permeated through every room of the hospital. The ceiling light above his bed was even shaking. 

“Did...did that not work?” Atem asked, the color draining from his face. 

“Atem…” Yugi said gently. “Gods—why are Tristan and Téa here?” he rolled over to the side in his bed dramatically, hissing in pain as he tugged the sheets over his head. 

“I...peed my pants.” Tristan admitted. “...Téa,  _ why  _ do you look turned on from that?”

Atem sighed. “ _ Gods... _ have I lost all of my previous abilities?” He sighed. He supposed he hadn’t mind crushed anyone since getting his new body. He cracked his knuckles. He may have been shorter than both of his alleged friends, but he was sure that he could lift them both and throw them out of the room. Or possibly down the stairs. Before he could, however, he was interrupted. First by Yugi again.

“What...is going on?” He mumbled, wincing.

“Nothing,” Atem replied, cupping Yugi’s cheek. “You can rest.”

And then by the doctor.

“You all need to leave.”

“TRISTAN TAYLOR REPORTING FOR—”

“Shut up, Tristan,” Téa sighed. 

“You are all  _ idiots _ ,” Atem hissed. “You’d think you could  _ shave  _ Yugi’s head and pin the blame on Arthur and Miho—”

“Wait, what?” Yugi asked.

“—No, I don’t think so!” Atem continued, “You are  _ very lucky  _ I have lost my mind crushing abilities. However, I can certainly arrange physically harming you in an alternative manner. This includes the sexually perverse doctor.”

“ _ Sir— _ ”

“We are leaving!” Atem declared in a huff. “ _ We  _ are leaving by  _ choice! _ ” He lifted Yugi out of his bed and carried him bridal style once again. 

“The insurance won’t cover this visit if you leave without my recommendation!” The doctor hissed.

Atem paused. “Fine. He will stay, and I will stay with him. I will stand guard all night. How dare you allow these two in here to  _ harm  _ my aibou! They’ve brought a razor in to slice him up like a simple holiday ham! My  _ lawyer  _ will not like this at all!”

Atem had no lawyer. But he had watched a lot of TV. He assumed Kaiba could hire him a lawyer if he “agreed” to a “duel.”

The doctor paled. “They... _ what? _ I’m calling the police. I’m so sorry to have overlooked this. Can I offer you a free...juice?”

“Apple.” Atem hissed.

“Could I have an orange juice?” Tristan meekly asked.

“ _ SECURITY! _ ” The doctor screamed. Tristan’s pee was now visibly pooling onto the floor. Téa was screaming something about friendship and juice. The security guards dragged them out.

“Good riddance.”

~the next morning~

Joey and Arthur were enjoying a picnic at the local park. Joey breathed in the fresh air, smiling. He felt  _ normal  _ for once. Dating Arthur was quite possibly the  _ best  _ thing to have ever happened to him. They did engage in furry games, but with healthy boundaries. Arthur was encouraging, supportive, and even helped him repair his friendship with Yuge. He hasn’t even thought about Tristan since.

“Say...what even happened to Yuge?” he mumbled to himself. He hasn’t even seen Téa or Atem for that matter for quite sometime now. 

“Something on your mind?” Arthur asked, stroking his arm.

Joey smiled, sheepishly. “I just haven’t heard from Yuge or Atem in awhile…For some reason, I feel like something’s wrong. That’s dumb though...right? I mean, we’re sitting here having such a nice time together, I shouldn’t be worrying about them.” 

“It’s not dumb at all, Joey.” Arthur encouraged, drawing the younger man into his side. “You should always trust your gut instinct. Shall we call them and check in?”

Joey kissed him on the cheek and smiled. “You’re right, Arthur. That wouldn’t hurt.” He then decided to call Yugi.

The call was answered, but it was Atem who spoke. “Joey?”

“Atem? Hey, is Yuge alright? I haven’t seen him for a bit...I know we have our own personal lives, but he usually screams to me about Solomon by this hour. Oh...I’m sorry, are you trying to have sex right now?”

“ _ No,  _ Joey,” Atem audibly sighed. “Yugi...is in the hospital.”

“The hospital?” Joey cried out. Arthur squeezed his hand. “Is he alright?”

“He’ll be alright...he was attacked by a disgruntled customer and has a concussion.” Atem’s voice was bitter.

“Oh no…” Joey clenched the phone with anger. “Is there anything I can do? I’ll gladly beat anyone who hurts my best bud like that!” 

“He won’t say who did it.” Atem mumbled. It sounded like he was taking a sip of a drink. “Oh, and  _ Téa and Tristan  _ came by to shave his head in the middle of the night to somehow make you jealous.”

Joey was stunned. “I... _ what? _ ” He seethed. 

“I...I don’t know. I have to go, Yugi’s waking up. He’s going home later if you wish to  _ quietly  _ visit.”

Joey ended the call. He turned to Arthur, frowning. “It’s Téa and Tristan. I...I think they’re upset we’re together. Yugi got punched, and from what it sounded like, they were...trying to blame  _ you? Or me? _ ”

Arthur shook his head and sighed. “They’re upset and angry, which is understandable. But with time, it will fizzle out. You should visit your friend and keep him company.”

“I don’t think he’ll be going home for a bit, but maybe after our date.” Joey sighed. He smiled at the older man. They’d  _ just  _ started dating, but it felt like they’d been together for much longer. 

“Sounds wonderful.” Arthur smiled as he popped a sparkling cider. He poured two glasses of it. “I’d offer to accompany you, but I feel that it’d be best if I avoid going to Solomon’s house unannounced.”

“That’s completely understandable, Artie.” Joey said, taking a glass. Visibly relaxed, he snuggled next to Arthur. Screw Tristan. He couldn’t believe an ex-lover of his could be so cruel to his best friend.

TO BE CONTINUED!


	3. dont eat mold kids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> will there be sex? o.o

Solomon was eating a pint of ice cream and crying in Yugi’s bedroom. When Yugi screamed at him that this was  _ his  _ bedroom, Solomon only wailed and slammed the door shut. So now, here was Solomon Muto, smearing his ice cream all over Yugi’s bed sheets.

“Solomon!” Atem banged on the door repeatedly. He sounded furious. “Open this door immediately! Yugi is home from the hospital waiting downstairs to rest! I do  _ not  _ want him to see you smearing your grease and oil all over his bed.”

Solomon frowned, puzzled. “Then who was the baby grandson screaming at me earlier? Since when was little mistake grandson in the hospital?”

“That was  _ me,  _ you delusional old man,” Atem sneered. “Open this door for the love of Ra!”

“NO,” Solomon roared, spilling his ice cream everywhere. “Arthur broke up with me, I’m allowed to be sad!”

“Go be sad in your own room!” Atem yelled, punching the door. His knuckles split and blood stained the white door. He swore in Ancient Egyptian. “I am out of patience, Solomon! I will break this blasted door down and send you the bill for its repair!” 

“Try me,” Solomon hissed, like a snake. He threw his empty ice cream pint at the door. He rolled onto the floor like a roly poly. It was his ultimate form.

Atem groaned and decided to let it go. Solomon would most likely cry himself to sleep. Atem figured he could push the old man out of the window by then.

Atem went downstairs.

“Yugi,” he sighed. “Your sweaty grandfather refuses to leave your room. He says Arthur broke up with him.”

“Damnit,” Yugi hissed in pain. The lights were too bright for him, and his head was hurting more than usual due to his concussed state. Then he noticed Atem’s hand before he squeezed his eyes shut. “Is your  _ hand _ okay? Do we have to go back to the hospital?”

Atem looked and noticed that his fist was now smeared with blood. He scowled. “It’s alright, Aibou.” This wasn’t the first time he’d punched an inanimate object, but it was the first time he’d actually  _ bled  _ from doing so. “Do you have any moldy bread?”

“... _ Why  _ are you asking for that?”

“To soak up the blood from my knuckles,  _ obviously _ .” 

“What? No, you don’t need that!” Yugi exclaimed, but it was too late. Atem had left for the kitchen to wrap a moldy piece of bread Solomon had clearly forgotten about around his knuckles.

Yugi sighed. “I...I’m going to sleep on the couch. Since  _ Solomon  _ has made himself comfortable.”

“Would you like the lights turned off, Aibou?” He ripped off a piece of moldy bread with his teeth and chewed through it. “This tastes funny,” he commented.

“That’s because it’s  _ mold _ , for fuck’s sake Atem!” Yugi scowled. “Spit that out right now!” 

“Absolutely not!” Atem swallowed the bread whole, without even chewing it. 

~ambulance~

“Sir,” the EMT sighed, “you are experiencing severe stomach pains because you willingly ate mold.”

“Blasted commoner! You don’t know what I ate!”

“Your...friend? Brother? Told me so…”

“He is my  _ boyfriend! _ ” Atem roared. “ **_MIND CRUSH!”_ **

Nothing happened.

“Oh, that’s right, it doesn’t work anymore. I guess I’ll just have to kill you in your sleep then.”

“Excuse me, sir?”

“Where do you live?”

“Atem,” Yugi interrupted, sighing. “Relax.”

“I will not relax!” He hissed, doubling over.

Yugi sighed again, leaning against his fiance. Atem sighed too, clutching his abdomen. It was an exhausting day. 

“Look, Yugi. My hand looks better.” Atem pointed out. “The mold truly did help!”

“...”

“...At least, externally. Internally, my organs may fail soon.”

“How much mold did you ingest?!”

“Enough.”

Yugi sighed...again. Here they were, heading back to the hospital. Already. 

The staff was not pleased to see them back merely two hours after they’d left.

The same doctor from before sighed. “You ate mold?”

Atem nodded.

“...Ok.”

~meanwhile~

Tristan was scurrying around the Game Shop, looking for Yugi.

“Yugi!” he cried. “Yuge-poo!”

“What in the?” Solomon rolled over to where Tristan was. “What are you doing? Are you my grandson?”

“Where is YOGI!”

“Are you my furry rat grandson? Have you seen my mistake grandson?” Solomon asked, picking at his belly button lint. He looked at it curiously before pocketing it. 

“WHERE IS MY YUGE POO?” Tristan shrieked. “I have to apologize!”

“I think he is off with my baby grandson.”

“Atem?!”

“Is that his name? The homosexual pharaoh?”

Tristan growled like the Alpha Male he was. He shoved Solomon to the ground before storming out of the Game Shop. 

“Do you want to be my alpha?” Solomon cried out. He received no answer other than a slamming door. It was the bathroom door where he’d lock himself in for the next few hours.

“Why won’t any homosexuals love me?” Solomon cried to himself. “Not that I am one…” He mumbled hastily.

~hospital~

“You actually should be fine to leave soon, Atem.” The doctor said hesitantly. “Yugi, you really should be at home resting, too.”

“My fiance ate mold.” Yugi moaned.

“It was a remedy in my day.” Atem huffed. 

The two slowly packed up to leave. Atem called Joey for a ride, who had apparently turned over a new leaf. He was no longer driving his car in his fursuit. 

“I’m still hungry…” Atem grumbled. “Do you have some snacks?”

Yugi sighed, opening one of Tea’s purses that he has been holding onto indefinitely and retrieving some crackers for Atem. “There’s no mold on these.”

Atem munched on his crackers as the two (finally) left the hospital. He kissed Yugi on the cheek. “Thank you, Aibou.”

Yugi sighed again. “Of course...please don’t do that again, Atem! You really scared me.”

“Eating the cracker…?”

Yugi glared, hissing in pain. “You know what I’m talking about! Eating moldy food! You don’t know what kind of mold that was, or how long it was rotting behind the fridge! You know my grandpa doesn’t clean.”

“If you must know, in  _ my  _ day, we gladly ate the  _ sand  _ that we would make sand castles out of. There were no refrigerators or…”

“No!  _ NO,  _ Atem, you did not eat sand—!”

The doctor from earlier eyed them suspiciously. “Do you need assistance?”

Atem spit on his shoes. “Out of my way! Foolish doctor! Our furry friend is here to pick us up!”

The doctor sighed and walked away. Medical school wasn’t worth this shit.

Joey pulled up in his new ride with Arthur.    
“Hey guys!”

“Furry friend! Did you get a new car?” Atem gasped. “Spectacular!”

“Yes! Arthur bought it for me. Hop in!”

Atem and Yugi slid in the backseat. Atem poked Yugi’s ribs. “You have to buy me a car.”

“I’m not your sugar daddy, dammit Atem!”

Joey turned pink. Arthur winked at him and pinched his cheek.

“Joey made me something nice too,” Arthur smiled. He passed a flower pot to Atem. It had a heart painted on the pot with “A+J” painted inside of it.

“You...bought your sugar baby a car…” Atem inquired. “And he made you this filthy pot instead?”

“Atem!” Joey scowled. 

Yugi groaned. “Don’t listen to him, he’s just in a bad mood because he ate mold and we had to go back to the hospital.”

“Why did you eat mold?” Arthur frowned. 

“Because, back in  _ my  _ day…”

“I can’t listen to this anymore…” Yugi sighed, tuning out their conversation and staring out the window. 

Soon enough, Joey arrived back at the Game Shop. It seemed suspiciously quiet from the outside, a probable good sign Solomon passed out asleep! 

“Don’t hold your breath, Yugi.” Atem mumbled. He’d heard that train of thought over their mind link. “He might be in our room smearing food on the walls again.”

Yugi leaned against Atem’s shoulder, sighing. “Thanks for the ride. Won’t you two come in?” He asked Joey and Arthur.

Arthur held up his hands. “I shouldn’t, I wouldn't want to cause any discomfort or drama.”

“No, no, no, it’s fine. We’re all adults.” Yugi insisted, even though Atem was literally just in the hospital for eating mold. Apparently his concussion was that bad where he thought it’d be okay for Arthur to come into contact with Solomon.

“Thanks, Yuge,” Joey smiled. “It’ll be okay, Artie!” He kissed him. “Let’s go inside!”

~game shop~

Concussed Yugi opened the door to absolute chaos. 

“ _ Hondaaaaa!  _ Open the door!” Miho banged her fists on the bathroom door repeatedly. 

“Miho, please hold my purse!” Tea whined. “One of my purses went missing and I can’t lose another one again!”

Yugi awkwardly stepped back.

“ _ No, _ Anzu! I won’t hold your purse. Tristan hasn’t been answering my calls and he won’t hold mine!”

Loud sobbing could be heard from behind the bathroom door. And in the kitchen. The latter was attributed to Solomon. There was melting ice cream smeared all over the floor. 

“Grandpa…?” Yugi asked, hesitantly. He eyed Joey and Arthur, ushering them to the door. 

Big mistake. 

“YUUUUUUUUUUUGIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!” Solomon roared, barreling into the main room. It was his final form. Again. He paused when he saw Joey—and  **_Arthur_ ** —who was protectively holding him close.

“Joey.” Solomon sneered. “Ex-Alpha.”

“Solomon,” Arthur greeted, quietly. “Ah, I see…” he awkwardly lifted his shoe to see the smeared ice cream all over, “...you’ve been redecorating.”

Solomon growled, though the sound was very omega in nature. It came out more like cat’s meow. “What are you doing with  _ my  _ mistake grandson!”

“If you must know, Yugi and Atem both had to visit the hospital today,” Arthur informed, “though I suppose you have been sobbing too much to notice.”

Solomon’s face went beet red. He started to squeal like a pig. “I was  _ NOT  _ crying! My medical condition was flaring up!” He lurched towards Arthur, and the two started to attack each other.

Tristan burst out of the bathroom. “MY ALPHA SENSES ARE TINGLING!” He screamed.

Miho gasped. “Honda! You’re into the Omegaverse?”

“Yes,” Tristan answered. “If that’s not what you like, Miho, then too bad. I’m proud of who I am!”

Miho, stunned, didn’t speak for a moment. Arthur and Solomon continued to beat each other up, and Atem was cheering it on. 

Tea sighed dramatically. “Is someone going to hold my purse or not?”

“Honda…” Miho ignored her, and smiled up at him. “I’m...in the Omegaverse too,” she grabbed his hand. “I’m a Delta.”

“What the hell?!” Tea exclaimed. 

Tristan shook his head. “I...don’t want a Delta. I WANT MY OMEGA BACK!”

“NEVER!” Arthur roared. He grabbed Tristan by the neck and wrestled him to the ground. Solomon belly-flopped into the fight for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Atem was throwing money on them all and screaming. Yugi was so concussed, he was disassociating from it all. Miho sobbed as her love interest wrestled for dominance with a senior citizen. 

“Arthur!” Joey screamed. “Quick, mark me!”

“Miho! Hold my purse!” Téa wailed.

“No! You hold mine, Beta!”

“Cheerio!” Bakura stepped into the Game Shop. “I saw an ambulance driving back here and I assumed your Pop was in cardiac arrest again, I’m CPR certified here to help!”

Atem decided right then and there he wanted to get in on the fight too. He punched Bakura in the face. 

“BLOODY HELL!” Bakura screamed. 

“I have to fight you in Yugi’s honor!” Atem screamed. 

“I don’t want Yugi you bloody Yankee, or er, Egyptian! I want  _ Téa! _ ” Bakura screamed.

“ _ Ewwwww, _ ” Téa wailed. “Gross, Bakura! I want Miho and Tristan! I want us to be a threesome.”

“I want Joey!” Tristan screamed, grabbing Arthur by the collar as Arthur attempted to mark his partner’s neck.

“I want Arthur—not you, Tristan! You should’ve thought about that before you said no homo! You’re a toxic Alpha!” 

Solomon wailed, banging his hands on the floor repeatedly. “I WANT A HOMOSEXUAL MAN!”

Yugi collapsed onto the floor. Probably from the major concussion absolutely no one was paying attention to. Or from his lack of will to be a part of any of this. Atem finally walked away from the limey to tend to his partner and bring him to their room during the big reveal. 

“Solomon...you…” Arthur murmured sadly. He looked between his mate and his ex-mate sighing. This had become so complicated so fast. “Are you... _ with _ homo?”

“...A  _ little  _ homo.” Solomon answered meekly.

Arthur smiled. “I’m proud of you, Solomon.”

“It’s time for me to move on,” Solomon answered sadly. “I need a new man in my life.”

“As do I.” Arthur nodded, looking fondly at Joey. He ruffled his hair instead of biting his neck. The threat had been eliminated.

Tristan sobbed on the floor. “What am I gonna do? Where is my happy ending? My  _ ever after!”  _ He screeched in a very un-alpha-like way. “I need a new man!” 

Silence ensued. Tristan and Solomon eyed the staircase...where Atem had taken Yugi upstairs to their bedroom.

It clicked. Arthur stared. “No. No.  _ Solomon,  _ Atem is dating your grandson -”

“I NEED A NEW MAN!” Solomon roared, running to the stairs as fast this immense beast could. Tristan followed him, slipping on the melted ice cream. 

“NO!” Tristan screeched. “ATEM IS MY MAN!”

Tristan and Solomon began rapidly banging on the bedroom door on the same bloody spot Atem had left. “ATEM!” They shrieked. “ATEM!”

“What do you want?!” He asked on the other side.

“Adopted grandson, I have realized  _ you  _ are the Alpha I need in my life!” Solomon roared.

“What in the name of  _ Ra…”  _ he and Yugi looked at each other in disgust. “ _ Solomon! _ I am engaged to  _ your  _ grandson!”

“We’re not related by blood, adopted grandson!”

“You’re missing the damn point!” 

“He’s an Omega!” Tristan interrupted hysterically. “Atem! Be my Omega. I need you to have my litter.”

“WHAT?!”

“I can smell you are in heat! Let me help you satisfy your needs!”

“That might be me, Tristan…” Solomon interrupted sheepishly.

“ _ Heat?! _ That is enough. Stop banging on the door, if you do not know by now, my partner has a concussion! I am not interested in  _ either  _ of you.” Atem  _ hissed.  _ “And frankly, Tristan. I am  _ not  _ an Omega, I can assure you.”

“You’re lying!” Tristan roared. “I  _ know  _ Yugi is your Alpha!”

“Tristan, how many fucking times do we have to tell you this? We’re  _ not  _ in the Omegaverse, we’re  _ not  _ furries, now leave!”

“YUGI TOPS ATEM, I KNOW IT!” Tristan screamed. 

“THE PHARAOH IS NOT TOPPED BY ANYBODY!”

Yugi opened his bleary eyes. “What…? What is going on?”

Atem ran his hand through his hair. “Nothing...Tristan is just...being  _ Tristan _ .”

“I top you sometimes…” Yugi mumbled.

“HUSH,” Atem nearly shrieked. “Tristan doesn’t need to know that!”

Tristan and Solomon continued to scream, wail, and bang on the door. Yugi held his head in his hands, sighing. He really hated his life. 

Atem sheepishly placed some headphones on. “Aibou, I will open the door and kill them. I can’t Mind Crush them, but certainly I can pick them up and throw them down the stairs. Preferably in a garbage can.”

“No, Atem,” Yugi sighed, grasping his hands. “We can’t kill them, as much as I am close to nowadays. We haven’t even had sex yet!”

“I know,” Atem frowned. “But I promise we will.” He stood up, and opened the door. “Stay here. I’ll deal with...the furries.”

Atem shoved the crying Tristan and Solomon out of his way, and went downstairs. Perhaps he could convince Pegasus to trap their souls in a TV or something of the sorts. It was worth a shot.

“That limey Bakura outside was looking to play furry games with you both. I forget which... _ category _ he falls in, and he was with some other furry too. Why don’t you go find out?” Atem lied. Bakura was not a furry and did not enjoy those games. “Besides,” Atem growled, biting his tongue hard in anticipation for the demeaning lie he was about to utter. “Yugi and I are Betas.”

“That’s a dealbreaker.” Tristan and Solomon mumbled simultaneously. 

“Now get the fuck out of here, and leave us alone! Go to therapy or something, for Ra’s sake!”

Tristan and Solomon awkwardly walked out of the Game Shop, mainly scared by Atem’s glare. Even though Solomon literally lived here, he wasn’t going to be returning for a while. He had some soul searching to do.

“Everything’s alright now,” Atem nodded towards Joey and Arthur.

“Thanks, Phawoa!” Joey clapped Atem on the back, who nearly slipped and fell from the ice cream. Holding hands with Arthur, Joey skipped off into the sunset.

Atem watched them skip off together. A bizarre pairing indeed. But definitely not worse than the idea of Solomon with literally anyone.

As for Miho and Téa, they were currently making out in the corner of the Game Shop, holding each other’s purses. Atem definitely didn’t expect that. 

“I’ll be a twosome with you, Miho.” Téa gushed.

“Let’s go back to my place,  _ Téa... _ I want to buy a collar for you.” She winked. And for once, Téa didn’t look forlorn for Atem.

Atem shrugged and walked away. Thank the gods she had finally moved on.

Then it hit him. Was the Game Shop now...empty? Were he and Yugi finally alone? 

He raced upstairs as fast as he could. It was time for sex. 

Then he remembered that his partner had a concussion. It was time for cuddling.

~Valentine’s Day~

Now it was time for sex. There would be a lot of it.


End file.
